strip me down naked

did i get your attention with that title? good, good. that was my plan. now that i have you here......

why is it SO difficult to tell someone their fly is undone? we ask each other all the time "do i have food in my teeth?" or "will you tell me if my skirt moves over 2 degrees to the left?" but when it comes to our zippers being unzipped, it's probably the most awkward thing to have to point out to someone.

i guess it's because, i mean, that's their.... ahem..... lady or man parts RIGHT THERE. it's not like telling someone they have a piece of food on their face or that their hair is falling out of its up do. it's basically saying to someone, "listen... i don't want to alarm you, however, your genitalia is about 10 seconds away from exposing itself without your consent or, at the very least, drawing serious attention to itself without you knowing."

the victim of the forgotten zipper could be the most buttoned-up and put together person you've ever seen, but if that zipper is undone.... fuggedaboutit. it's like if kate middleton were to be sporting some jeggings while you're sipping tea with her highness, having a gay ole time when suddenly you see that her crotch area looks like the eye of sauron from lord of the rings (a black abyss). that zipper is supposed to be there to nonverbally say "YOU SHALL NOT PASS!!!!!"