Hello, Internet fiends! Hey, have you ever been looking down at your phone so intensely for such an elongated period of time that you find your neck and head actually stuck in that position and immediately hate yourself so much for letting it get to this point? That happens to me at least once a day, and I wanted to lament about it to you guys to let you know we’re all fucked in this digital age. You’re not alone.
ANYWAY, I haven’t done a solid “Into It” post in a while so I wanted to share with you guys what I am currently about. I’ve been called an “influencer” a few times in my life, so I like writing these posts in an effort to capitalize on that and hopefully influence the fuck out of y’all.
INTO IT: Any burgundy or eggplant colored sweater in existence.
I’m no fashion blogger, but if I had to put money on what the hot color of fall is, I’d bank what I could (which is not much) on burgundy, eggplant, or any color within the vicinity of that family. Not only because I personally look fantastic in it (I have brown hair and darker skin, what do you want from me?), but also because it’s a gorgeous, rich, delicious color on its own. Pair it with an annoyingly perfect matching lip color, and you’ve got yourself a one-way ticket to YAS QUEEN town. Here are two recent purchases I’ve made that I love very deeply and will wear the shit out of IF IT EVER ACTUALLY GETS COLD OUTSIDE.
INTO IT: Glossier Lipstick
I’m almost never not wearing lipstick. Any time I’ve tried not to, I feel like a washed out, hideous monster unworthy of love (not really, but kinda). I can’t really remember when it became such a staple in my beauty routine, but there’s no denying it’s basically a part of me now. That said, I get boners over new lipstick lines. MAC is my ride or die with NARS following close behind it, sort of like that one friend who may not be your BEST friend but who you always have the greatest time with any time y’all hang out. My coworker came into work last week wearing a fantastic color upon her lips, which prompted me to be all “WTF is that?” and she was all “This,” handing me a skinny white tube. I guess Glossier started as a skincare line and, within the past few years, has started dipping its toe in the makeup waters (just its toe though since they don’t offer waterproof products right now). Their lipstick is a mix of ‘stick and stain and, although the tube I ordered is en route to me and I have yet to actually try it, it looked fantastic on my friend, and I just know it’s gonna be my new favorite go-to. I got “Crush,” but you can get whichever color you want. I guess.
INTO IT: Halo Top Ice Cream
If you follow me on any one of the thousands of social media platforms (P.S. icantemma on Snapchat) I litter, you would’ve had to go really out of your way yesterday to not see me post about Halo Top. This shit, y’all. THIS. SHIT. Look, as a general rule of thumb, I am not one for diet substitutes. If I’m gonna eat ice cream, I eat ice cream. If I’m have some peanut butter, I do the damn thing. But when you’re truly addicted to a certain type of food that’s not awesome for you, finding a legitimate sub that actually doesn’t taste like diet dog shit is what I imagine Leprechauns feel when they find that pot of gold at the end of a rainbow. People wonder what makes Halo Top “healthier” than regular ice cream, so I did some googling and figured it out. As found on Healthy Eater: “Halo Top uses just a little real sugar and then increases sweetness by using erythritol and stevia, which are both almost zero-calorie but natural sweeteners…(it) also enhances the nutrition of their ice cream by adding prebiotic fiber into every batch as well as boosts the protein content by adding concentrated milk protein.” And the best part? IT TASTES FUCKING AMAZING. It’s not everyone’s bag, and I get that. But it’s mine, and I’m obsessed. Just the other week, they rolled out 10 NEW FLAVORS, and you better believe I ran my ass over to the one store in town I knew to have the new flavors and LOADED THE FUCK UP. I tried Oatmeal Cookie last night and literally wept tiny tears of joy. One down, five more to go. Say a prayer for me.
INTO IT: Leaving town FOR Halloween
I hate Halloween. Yeah, you read that right. Rub your eyes and read it again if need be, but it’s real. Halloween went downhill for me the moment I experienced it in college. Once I realized the truth behind the Mean Girls quote about the holiday, I was done. “Halloween is the one night a year when girls can dress like a total slut and no other girls can say anything about it.” But guess what? I’m saying stuff about it because it ruined my favorite holiday once I was old enough to experience the WHOREer. It’s weird ’cause I’m a tough cookie who cusses, gets crass, burps, farts, and can be inappropriate AF with the rest of ’em. But there is something about the blatant objectivity of girls on Halloween that murders my soul. I can’t handle it. Girls using the holiday as an excuse to wear literal lingerie and let their tits and ass hang out as they do rocks me to my core. Call it feminism, insecurity, or what have you, but it makes me irrationally upset. That’s why I am so into the fact that I am leaving town for Halloween this year. Sure, there will be still be sluts running amuck in Chicago, but they won’t be my Dallas sluts. I’ll be a few degrees removed from their boob and butt displays and surrounded by cold weather, my sister, dogs, and my costume idea I’ve been mulling over months (you’ll have to wait and see…).
INTO IT: Little sneakers
No, not like sneakers for infants or toddlers (although, admittedly, those are adorable). I’m talking about the resurgence of “throw on” sneakers. The little, casual lace-ups you throw on to run an errand or when you’re having a dress-down but still dress cute kind of day. Actual athletic shoes are always tight, but don’t exactly translate super well into the everyday. You can’t really go too wrong with casual sneaks. Adidas, Vans, and Keds all offer the most adorable of the adorable. Here are some images to marinate over (biased images since I own each of these kicks):
Stan Smith adidas originals
Old Skool Vans
Double Up Keds
INTO IT: My almost-every-morning shake
I don’t do just protein powder+water(or almond milk) shakes. Like, fok that. If I’m gonna do a shake for breakfast in the morning, that shit’s gotta be involved and tasty. Sometimes finding the perfect combo of flavors for you can be trying, so I wanted to share the shake I make post-gym-mornings because IT’S SO GOOD DOE. Here’s what it entails:
3/4 cup unsweetened almond milk
1 medium banana
1 scoop of vanilla pea protein powder (because whey is foul and tears up my stomach like I tear up dance floors)
2 TBSP of PB2 (because it’s delicious and about 1/3 the calories of regular PB)
1 TBSP ground flaxseed (because fiber AF)
I throw in about six ice cubes and blend that ish UP. If you like peanut butter and banana, you will love this. And if you don’t, that’s on you.
So, what are you into this week? Share with the class (in the comments).