Into It, Vol. 1

If you’ve ever taken the time to listen to Whitney and I’s podcast “2 Girls, 1 Closet,” then you’ve most definitely heard our segment entitled “Into It” in which we pop off about things we are or aren’t into. We haven’t gotten into my closet in a while, mainly because I got a boyfriend and making out takes up a lot of my time on weeknights, and Whitney is a boss ass bitch at her job and has some sort of work-related function almost nightly. Needless to say, finding time to stuff ourselves into my ill-placed closet (it’s in my kitchen? Oh, older homes) has been next to impossible. That’s why I felt the need to write my own list of things I’m into currently, because I think I tend to like legit stuff and have the need to share it with anyone who cares. So, without further ado…

INTO IT: Cotton On’s line of workout clothes

OH. OK. So, for those of you who haven’t caught on quite yet, I have two Instagram accounts. My usual emmasthing one in which I post mostly #OOTD pictures, social outings, my dog, you know — the yuge. However, it’s pretty typical for BBG gals to create separate BBG-centric accounts for accountability, not to mention the community of BBGers are some of the most supportive, uplifting, nicest people you will probably never meet IRL. That Instagram name is emmagbbg, and I by no means want you to follow it — I’m just trying to setup this “into it.” Also, please be warned I am a completely different person on that account (i.e. super positive, optimistic, encouraging, etc.). Via my secondary all BBG ERRYTHANG account, I find a lot of great recipes, workout motivation, and awesome new gear. I saw one girl in particular wearing the craziestcoolest leggings I’ve ever seen, asked her where they were from, and promptly ordered them. Who knew Cotton On had an entire active line??? Not me! And the best part? IT’S AFFORDABLE AF. I ordered the leggings and the shorts in the same pattern, and BOTH are amazing quality, comfortable as hell, and probably the best pair of leggings and shorts I now own. HUGE fan. Check it out.

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INTO IT: Living Proof Dry Shampoo

I think every female has that A-HA! moment with dry shampoo. You’re going along, living life as you’ve always known it. Washing your hair when it’s dirty, not thinking twice about it because it’s what you’ve always known. Then, one day, maybe it’s a friend. Or a frenemy. Or an overheard conversation. Or that one uncomfortably-jacked woman in the gym locker room. But, out of nowhere, you’re enlightened about dry shampoo. “Dry? Shampoo?” You wonder to yourself. “But what could that possibly look/smell/be like?” Then you try it, and you can’t believe you’ve gone without for this long. And the more comfortable you get with it, you’ll start experimenting to see just how much you can get away with when it comes to covering your dirty tresses with spray shampoo. I used PSSSST! for the longest time, until I started to listening to the Modern Love podcast (I know, how random). Living Proof is their main sponsor, more specifically their dry shampoo. I decided to give it a go even though it’s pricier than your average drugstore bottle, and I once again was shown why better, more expensive products are worth the money. I love this shit — it smells delightful and is able to hide my sweaty ass gym hair better than any hat or shower ever could.

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INTO IT: Abercrombie’s rebrand

Yeah, you read that right. ABERCROMBIE. As in Abercrombie&Fitch. A&F. AF. The store you most likely grew up browsing aimlessly with your slutty friends all the while being slowly brain-damaged by the cologne they dumped all over every orifice of every store. The one with the shirtless Magic Mike strippers as greeters. FUCKING ABERCROMBIE. I’m not sure when or how the rebrand happened — all I know is I saw blogger Poor Little It Girl rocking this dress by them and couldn’t believe how darling it was. Of course, the way she had it styled helped a lot. Something compelled me to close my eyes and go for it, and OMG I’m so glad I did because IT’S CUTE AS HELL. 

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LIKE WHAT!? I still can’t believe it’s Abercrombie. Never in my deepest, darkest nightmares did I ever expect to be actively and willingly wearing anything by them past the age of 15/16. But here I am — a 29-year-old “woman” sporting this little grey number with buckets of pride. And it’s just one of the many cute dresses they have on the site right now. I actually ordered ANOTHER something that arrived yesterday, and I’m equally as in love with it. WHAT. I’M WILD. I’M A GD WILD CARD. Seriously, though. Check out their shit. You won’t be sorry, maybe just a little confused but in a good way.

INTO IT: Rtic Drinkware

My mom keeps me in-the-know about a bunch of random yet useful stuff. A fountain of knowledge and aggravation, I like to say. So, the other night when she sent me an email-long text about the new Rtic line of drinkware, I knew it was probably something I should read but couldn’t right then. However, my boyfriend was sitting directly next to me and was instantly bemused by the length of the text and claimed he “needed to know what it said.” Be warned: She mostly uses voice dictation, so shit’s gonna sound messed up. The text began, “I forgot to tell you that Yeti was…”

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See what I’m saying? Informative, but exhausting. However, the woman’s right — she had me try a sip of her “cold and delicious” water out of her Rtic tumbler the other night, and I have to admit it was still very cold and very delicious. The same Yeti quality for half the price? WAY into it.

INTO IT: Pool floats, specifically THE BAGEL

I got some fan mail last night in which the girl told me the Gold Bond Friction Defense has proven to be life-changing for her. Can’t tell you how happy that made me, BECAUSE IT’S TRUE. It’s seriously life-changing for anyone who’s ever suffered chaffing. She also asked me for the link to this summer’s most coveted pool float, my everything bagel. Guys, no lie — that float is everything. Not only is it hilarious, but it’s actually a clutch float. The ridges in it make sitting comfortably so much easier, and it’s the perfect thickness of float. I might be biased, but I love it. A lox. I give you permission to copy me, or at least get your own, hilarious pool float because they truly make pool days that much better. Happy summer to all and to all WEAR SUNSCREEN.

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xox,

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I Can, Vol. 1

I was recently challenged to write a list of things I can. I combatted this by saying, “Well half the stuff I say ‘I can’t,’ I’m saying in a positive way. Like ‘I can’t handle how great this or that is…’ But fine. I’ll do it.” So mark today down in your calendars as something monumental because I’m about to spin the shit out of this request.

I can…

with NextGen or powder nails. Typically, I can’t with any type of manicure because I believe it’s a waste of time and money. Regular manicures last no longer than the ones I perform on myself at home, and gel manicures fuck your nails up royally and grow way too fast, making you look like you’re going for some sort of Guinness record with your nasty ass, exposed nail beds. But powder nails ARE EVERYTHING. I’ve always kept my nails incredibly short — I just don’t want to deal. But my best friend grew hers out and got them filed into an almond shape, and the look of them was so beautiful, I had to try for myself. Powder is the only kind of treatment that really allows them to grow with minimal breakage, and I love it very much. The way my long power nails click and clack on the keyboard make me feel important and sassy as hell. Powder isn’t as popular as gel, so you’ll have to do some googling to figure out what nail salons do it near you. But LOOK AT THESE BEAUTIES. THOSE ARE ALL ME, BABY:

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I can…

NOT tell you how much more of a whole girl I feel like now that I’ve found my perfect foundation. For many years, I was wearing Laura Mercier’s tinted moisturizer. I felt it provided enough coverage without being cakey, old lady makeup. But this year, something changed. Not only was I noticing more frequent (albeit minimal) breakouts, but my face just wasn’t doing it for me anymore. I would get ready, performing my typical makeup routine and think “Meh.” I decided to research a bit, then visit Nordstrom to see what the makeup ladies could do with me. The prettiest black woman I’ve ever seen in my entire life introduced me to the most important four words: Charlotte Tilbury Magic Foundation. Y’all. Y’ALL. Life. Changing. Shit. I have dry, sensitive skin and so far, this stuff does not break me out or dry me out. It just makes me feel really pretty. It’s the perfect amount of coverage when tinted moisturizer isn’t enough but legitimate foundation is too much. I even apply it with a FOUNDATION BRUSH, GUYS. I’m a real woman now. Or getting there anyway. Check it out if you’re looking for a change.

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I can…

recommend this book to you, so I will. It’s called The Nest, and if you like dysfunctional family dramas, then this is the book for you. I love it and so did Amy Poehler, according to the cover.

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I can…

proudly admit I used Amazon Now for the first time last week and it was a delight. The story goes: I was supposed to have gum recession surgery on Thursday. I go in, get my blood drawn, tear up at least twice, get my first novocaine shot and check my Fitbit to see that my heart rate has sky rocketed to 112 and finally, when I’m settled down and completely numb all up in my mouth, the doctor tells me he sees some things he wants to get cleared up before he can perform the procedure. Yes, AFTER HE NUMBED ME. Needless to say, I was pretty frustrated and because I’m an emotionally sound 29-year-old, proceeded to SUPER ugly novocaine-cry in the chair. When I got home and realized the batteries in my thermostat had died and it was 90º outside, I felt even more defeated and decided my first-ever Amazon Now order was warranted. So I ordered batteries and Clorox toilet wand refills because the order had to be at least $15, and it arrived at my door in two hours. And I don’t regret it at all.

I can…

flaunt my results from BBG on here, so I will. Because, y’all, I’M PROUD. I’ve been doing this shit for almost AN ENTIRE YEAR. WHAT. I’ve never stuck with something for more than a year (that’s not true, but it seemed fitting to write). It’s still hard, it still can be a pain in the ass, I still miss workouts and have to make up for them or just start an entire week mid-week, but what matters is, I still do it. AM still doing it. Because I’ve never had results like this, I love the circuits, I love the structure, I love not having to think about what I’m going to do at the gym that day. It’s all in Kayla’s app, and it’s perfect. I still get down on myself, of course. I’m a female with a vagina. But when I look at progress pictures, I’m abruptly reminded of how fucking far I’ve come and how baller it is. 

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I can…

paint with all the colors of the wind. Bet you didn’t know that about me. It’s not something I advertise.

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finally state my stance on the whole “how bad is shampoo for your hair” debate. I’ve struggled with this for a long time. As a girl with curly hair, I’ve always been told that shampoo is the enemy because of its drying effect. That, if I’m going to do it, do it maybe once a week and condition the rest of the time. Well I’ve tried that, and it not only leaves my hair feeling greasy and grimy, but also ugly. So I gave up on the whole thing and decided to not revisit it again. That is until I stumbled upon this:

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Unwash. Guys, I don’t know, but it works. It is meant to replace your shampoo, but not act like a cheap all-in-one shampoo/conditioner combo. It’s a shampooconditioner. A condoo. A shamditioner. And it’s “bio-cleansing” meaning it doesn’t have the detergent agents in it that are the main culprit of drying your shit out. I’ve been using it for almost three weeks now, and it’s legitimiately all I need in the shower. I haven’t let regular shampoo touch my hair once, and I am liking what I’m seeing. It’s pricey, but most good things are. Like powder nails or premiere prostitutes.

Okay, that’s it. That’s all I can, and I barely could.

xox,

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Slow, Fast, And Everything In Between: A Piece About Commitment

In this day and age of Netflix and chilling, ghosting, breaking up over text, having heartfelt conversations over text, flirting via Instagram likes and comments, and God-knows-what going down in the DM, dating has gone from being annoying to downright depressing. Even with easy access to the opposite sex via dating apps like Bumble and Tinder, no one’s actually willing to commit. They treat the apps like games, swiping left and right with next to no intention of acting on anything. They’re window shopping at best, which is why you don’t hear back from your matches half the time, and that, my friends, is the bleak reality of the dating situation today.

HOWEVER (and that’s a big however hence the all-caps), every once in a very blue moon, someone on these apps does have intentions and good ones at that. They’re not banking on anything; in fact, they’ll most likely be flabbergasted if they’re to meet anyone of superior quality. But the point is they want to. They desire to. And, sometimes, they do. 

HOWEVER (another big however), if they do meet someone worthwhile and things seem to be going so well, they still have the big C to deal with. No, not that big C. The other big C — COMMITMENT. Just because this person was on this dating app to maybe meet someone by no means insinuates that they’re any different from the rest of our generation when it comes to actually pledging to take responsibility for something they very most likely started in the first place. That’s something we struggle with and will most likely continue to struggle with for the unforeseen future because we’re selfish assholes but at least we admit it.

Commitment. Fucking commitment, man. The idea seems simple yet implies so much and can so easily scare off the best of them. My personal belief is something Aziz Ansari actually wrote about in his book, Modern Romance. I don’t have the actual quote on hand because I don’t tote the book with me wherever I go, but he spoke to the idea that we almost have too many options. That these apps, with their seemingly never-ending line-up of potential matches, might actually be doing our generation more harm than good by bombarding us with choices. I think, by nature, humans are easily overwhelmed. Before these apps, you didn’t know when or how you’d meet your next romantic prospect. It was more of a mystery, which made the mere idea of it more exciting. Will it be the guy buying carrots and jarred minced garlic (gross) at Kroger? Or perhaps that cutie in the baseball cap you ended up sitting next to on a plane ride? Of course, that never actually happens. Before apps, you were probably meeting people via work or of friends of friends of friends of cousins of friends. Now, with these apps, you can sit at home in your rattiest fat girl clothes with 4-day old hair and go through potential mates like water because, if you don’t match with this one, you’ll probably match with the next one. 

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But the kicker is that having more options via these apps haven’t provided us with any greater results with finding love. In fact, it’s made it worse! And more complicated! And HAS CAUSED SO MUCH MORE SWEATY, TEAR-FILLED ANXIETY (no? just me?). 

HOWEVER (they just keep coming, don’t they?), let’s say you get past all the anxiety and upset and end up finding someone you really hit it off with. You’re going along, dating, kissing, sexing. You’re owning the new, butterfly stages of this courtship — basking in the glow of where it might go and what it all could mean for your (up until this point) abusive relationship with dating. 

Then, commitment comes up. Committing. You want to commit. You want them to commit. You want the god of commitment to rain down upon whatever-the-fuck “this” is and get it on lock. Someone needs to commit to something soon because you’ve realized… you don’t DO “slow.”

And that’s the entire point of this post (I realize it’s taken me about 650 words to get there, but I got there). I’ve realized over the past few months that I can’t go slow with dating. But I’ve also realized what that means to me; that is, what it looks like. And it’s probably different than what you’re assuming. Because when I state that I don’t do “slow,” I mean that when something as miraculous as meeting a great guy with whom I click with on all levels happens to me, I can’t act coy. I can’t be blasé about it. Sure, I can play that card for the first little while as I’m trying to figure out whether or not this guy is spongeworthy, but once I’ve decided I’m in it, I’m in it. In it to win it. I’m committed because I don’t know how else to be.

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I bet you read that and think “Oh, so she gets needy, attached, falls too hard, thinks he’s the One, and expects marriage by year’s end.” No. That’s not at all what I’m saying. I’m simply stating that, as someone who has been through the ringer with dating and knows how very seldom you meet someone that makes you stop and go “Oh,” I find it very hard to be casual. But not being casual doesn’t mean being so serious that we’re getting engaged tomorrow. It simply means just being committed to finding out what this could be. It means not wanting to play the field or continue to keep my options open because why would I want to if you have my attention? It means that slow is casual and casual isn’t enough when you like someone a lot. Moving “slow” is just another way of avoiding commitment. I move fast because all fast means to me is we’ve committed to commitment. No more, no less. 

Commitment doesn’t have to be scary, but our generation has made it as such. It doesn’t insinuate “for life.” It doesn’t imply any sort of guarantee. It doesn’t even mean we’ll make it a solid six months. It just means that, for now, you’re in it and willing to see how it pans out. We can talk slow, have slow sex, kiss slow, take our time having dinner — I might even let you be slow to text if you’re a busy person. But slow is just a copout for the terror of committing, and we’ve all got to GTF over it.

xox,

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